4 months and 10 days since my life changed forever

[enablelove]

This weekend has been rough, especially today, now that Dad is gone. We never were big on celebrating Father's Day, but we always had a dad to celebrate with. Now seeing all the social media posts everywhere just makes my heart ache.

I wrote this poem a few weeks ago when I was in an abyss with missing Dad and thought I'd share it. I want to post it somewhere so his name can be immortalized forever but idk if it's anywhere near good enough to publish. :/ If you have tips about that, let me know!


Tendrils of fire rage within me
Flames reaching higher and all-consuming
Plumes of smoke curl lazily in the air
Their pattern a juxtaposition to the beat of my heart
Sadness sits like a heavy weight on my chest
2 tons of steel-encased pain
Happiness seems so far away
A whisper of maybe drifting through the wind
Shame and betrayal butt heads
Both of them warring for a place of recognition
Emotions come and go but through them all I have a constant awareness of him being gone
It’s an agonizing ache of realization.


What did you think? I'm actually pretty proud of it.